Why "Just Let it Go" Doesn't work on Trauma

"Just let it go" can be a very hurtful thing to hear, and following this advice can be harmful as well.

We've all heard the phrase "just let it go," right? It’s one of those quick little nuggets of advice that people toss around when someone is feeling down or dealing with some heavy stuff. While the intention behind this saying is usually to help folks bounce back and find their emotional balance, it can feel a bit too simplistic. It often misses the mark when it comes to the messy, complicated nature of our feelings. So, let’s dive into why this advice might not always hit home and how it can really affect us on emotional, spiritual, and physical levels.

When someone is told to "just let it go," or when they tell themselves this, it can evoke a complex mix of emotions. On one hand, there may be a fleeting sense of hope that letting go could lead to relief and freedom from their burdens. However, this hope can quickly morph into frustration and self-doubt. The individual may feel as if they are failing to meet an unspoken expectation, questioning why they can’t simply shake off their pain or move on. This internal struggle can lead to feelings of isolation, as they might believe that others don’t understand the depth of their experience. The pressure to conform to this simplistic advice can also create a sense of guilt, as they grapple with the reality that their emotions are not easily dismissed. Ultimately, the phrase can feel dismissive, undermining the very real and valid emotions that need to be processed rather than brushed aside.

Emotional Impact

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• **Suppression of Feelings**: When someone tells you to "just let it go," it can sometimes make you feel like you need to shove your feelings down and pretend everything’s fine. Instead of working through emotions like anger, sadness, or frustration, you might feel this unspoken pressure to just brush them off. This can lead to emotional bottling, which is never a good thing.

• **Increased Anxiety**: Ignoring your feelings doesn’t just make them disappear; it can actually ramp up anxiety. When you feel like you have to put on a brave face and act like you’re unaffected, it can create this constant internal tug-of-war, making you feel even more stressed and emotionally tangled.

• **Feelings of Guilt or Shame**: If you’re struggling to let go of your feelings, you might start feeling guilty about it. This guilt can pile on top of everything else and create a negative self-image, leaving you feeling inadequate and even more overwhelmed.

Spiritual Impact

• **Disconnection from Self**: The whole "just let it go" mantra can sometimes lead to feeling disconnected from who you really are. Spiritual growth often requires us to face and understand our emotions, and skipping this step can really hold us back from developing into our true selves.

• **Lack of Authenticity**: When we brush our feelings aside, we might end up showing a version of ourselves that doesn’t feel real. This disconnect can leave a spiritual void, making us feel empty or lacking in purpose.

• **Stagnation in Growth**: Real spiritual growth often comes from tackling challenges and understanding our emotions. If we keep avoiding these tough feelings, we might find ourselves stuck in place, unable to move forward on our spiritual journeys.

Physical Impact

• **Stress-Related Health Issues**: Bottling up emotions can lead to chronic stress, which is linked to all sorts of health problems, like heart issues, a weakened immune system, and digestive troubles. Not fun at all!

• **Somatic Symptoms**: Sometimes, unprocessed emotions show up as physical symptoms. You might find yourself dealing with tension, headaches, or other physical discomforts as your body reacts to all the emotional distress.

• **Fatigue and Burnout**: Trying to keep up the appearance of emotional stability can be downright exhausting. This emotional labor can lead to physical fatigue and burnout, which definitely takes a toll on your overall well-being.

Alternative Approaches to Emotional Healing

Instead of just telling someone to "let it go," here are some warmer, more supportive ways to help:

• Encourage Expression: Give people the space to express their feelings in a safe environment. Whether it’s through journaling, chatting with a friend, or diving into a creative hobby, letting emotions out can be incredibly healing.

• Promote Mindfulness: Mindfulness practices like meditation or yoga can help people tune into their emotions, allowing them to experience and release them in a healthy way. It’s all about finding that balance!

• Seek Professional Support: Sometimes, talking to a therapist or counselor can be a game changer. They can offer tools and insights to help navigate through emotions, leading to a deeper understanding and healing.

• Establish a Routine: Creating a daily routine can provide structure and stability, helping individuals feel more grounded. Incorporating regular activities that bring joy can enhance emotional well-being.

• Engage in Physical Activity: Exercise is a powerful way to boost mood and reduce stress. Whether it’s a brisk walk, dancing, or joining a sports team, moving the body can lead to emotional release and improved mental health.

• Connect with Nature: Spending time outdoors can be rejuvenating. Nature has a calming effect and can help individuals reflect and recharge, fostering a sense of peace and emotional clarity.

  
  

If you've experienced trauma, you are allowed to experience your feelings- all of them.

Conclusion

So, while the advice to "just let it go" might sound helpful at first glance, it often overlooks the intricate and layered nature of human emotions. By recognizing the emotional, spiritual, and physical impacts of this mindset, we can explore healthier ways to process our feelings. Embracing our emotions instead of pushing them aside can lead to deeper healing and genuine personal growth. So let’s give ourselves permission to feel and heal, one step at a time!

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